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2002-03-08 8:48 a.m.

What is wrong with me? I mean, I guess it was nice to buy a dozen doughnuts for my workmates, but did I really need to buy an extra two, huge, quivering, mountain�sized doughnuts just for myself? And, then when I got to work and found that my team�mate bought doughnuts, too, did I really need to eat one of those, too? They feel so good to eat, but then I always feel sick and stupid and retarded afterwards.

I imagine a young sprite, bounding from hill to hill in the forest. Then, the magical fairy comes along...and, with a sprinkle of fairy dust and a wave of her magic wand, she turns him into a giant, hairy, ass�crack, packed full of lard and lumps of giblets and pork hearts and deep�fried, saturated groin�kicking. That is what happens to me when I put on my retarded face and eat three huge doughnuts.


This doughnut, today's pastry #3, added insult to injury. Big forehead, little face, gimpy arms, little yellow bus to school, doughnut eating retard. That is me.

I should know better by now. I really need to learn some moderation. I mean, seriously. I am like this about everything. I feel I need to go as far as one can go in everything I do, including eating. It is not such a bad trait in school or music of friendships or things like that. But, eating, for example, is not such a good one. Or, drinking...like the time when I tried to drink as much alcohol as I could on a flight to London, and I woke up after being asleep for who�knows�how�long with my head inside the toilet of the airplane's bathroom. I figured that I had fallen asleep there after vomiting, but who knows since I definitely could not remember.


MAIL! FOR ME! Holy God, yes! When packages arrive in the mail, I am poised and ready with the second�most�effective box�opening tool to hit the USA since September 11th.

On a happier note, my new microphone arrived today, so that makes me happy. I can not wait to use it. I have been working on breathing exercises and singing for a few hours every day for months in preparation for my recording session this weekend. I am so stoked. After four CDs where I basically just play guitar on other peoples' songs, it is just beyond exciting to be finally working on an album of my own songs�singing, playing guitar, everything.


Wow. The Lawson L251. I can not believe I have one of these now. This is just amazing.

I bought some pieces to make some more of the twin towers necklaces like I made before, and I am thinking about selling them. If anyone reading this would like to buy one, you can email me or something. They are going to be $20 including shipping, and you could PayPal the money to me. Email me first to check availability, as I only have enough stuff to make a few.


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