2002-12-09 11:56 a.m.

So, yes I am back. Life has been a bit of a whirlwind, but I am somehow readjusting to life in CA. I don't miss Sweden. But, I didn't miss CA either. I missed some of my friends and loved ones. But, I feel a bit out of place here now. I can no longer justify why I am here and why I am doing what I am doing anymore. Being in Sweden sort of burned off this fog that lingered over my life's landscape�a not�so�unpleasant but somewhat obscuring fog that prevented me from seeing my current life for exactly what it is.

So, now I must distill my thoughts and intentions and goals and such in order to decide where my next few footsteps might fall. I must make some decisions now that the fog is gone.

I have been toying with the idea that I should start to wholeheartedly devote my hours to something which I would do for free, rather than something that promises money, security, or the other addictive traps of this world. I always encouraged my friends to fill their lives with things they naturally would do for fun�even without pay. This always seems to result in the highest moral and spiritual quality of life�you do what you love and love what you do. But, I think that somehow along the way I got distracted or perhaps lost track of this truth.

Now, I need to get back on track. I need to start laying down my own, new track.


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