2007-04-10

Arlette and I broke up.

We went to San Diego together anyways. Wouldn't it be fun to go visit roadside attractions and make fun of local signage? Turns out that it was still pretty fun, in spite of the emotional distress we both were feeling.

We visited the headquarters of two space cults in one day: The Unarius Academy of Scienceand the Museum of Creation and Earth History.

The Unarius folks believe that thirty three planets will send spaceships to Earth to teach us about peace, love, and truth. The 33 ships will stack atop one another into a permanent tower, which will either serve as a headquarters or a university or possibly send out millions of volts of "safe" direct current electricity, like a Tesla coil—only made of UFOs. I think that was how they explained it.

The folks at the Unarius Academy seemed benevolent and sweet, sort of like how I'd imagine my nana would be if I got her high on marijuana.

The next space cult was just completely strange. It was the Museum of Creation and Earth History in El Cajon. The goal of their museum was show people that science supports the Christian Bible 100% of the time. And, if their science supports the Bible, then how could they be wrong, right?

It looked like a well funded natural history museum, only with scripture verses everywhere.

One of our favorite parts was the display where they explained how Noah saved the dinosaurs by bringing them aboard his ark. Wait, but how could such enormous creatures fit onto Noah's ship?

No problem. As the completely factual museum placards explained, Noah fit the dinosaurs on board because he only brought BABY DINOSAURS. Also, according to them dinosaurs are probably still alive.

Fact.

The trip was fun. I was sad some. Arlette was sad a lot. It's hard to break up and then go on vacation two days later.

Sometimes it's hard for me when she's so upset. My body reacts in fear, like I'm going to get screamed at or hit or something. I think that she's mad at me or that I did something wrong. I feel under attack. Then I get defensive and withdraw and turn into everyone's favorite superhero: Shitty Unsupportive Friend Man.

It's funny, because in our particular case she doesn't seem upset at me or mad at me. It's more that she's upset and mad, period. I think I'm just used to people being mad at me or upset at me. So, I come to expect it—every cell in my body expects it. (What a stupid thing to expect. I need to unlearn this ASAP.)

Today my mom and her best friend Dee took me to lunch and then on a drive. We drove around in Dee's fancy pants ultra mega super �ber BMW with LOUD SPEAKERS. We listened to my new album from start to finish, since Dee hadn't heard it yet.

They kept telling me over and over how amazing it was and how proud they were of me. It was like I couldn't hear their words, though. Or, more like it didn't matter.

I know that I know how to make good albums. What I don't know is how to be happy.

PREVIOUS ENTRY - NEXT ENTRY