2007-10-28 7:03 pm

Today I'm in Oakland at Sunshine & Janet's warehouse. We're getting ready to shoot the final scenes of the Just Go Out With Me short movie.

Today we're shooting the opening scene, in which I go into a gypsy fortune teller's tent. She looks into her crystal ball and tells me my future: I'm going to fall in love and experience zebra rides and puppet shows and trips to outer space!

So, I've been hanging out getting my hair dyed black, my eyebrows trimmed, my face getting all made up, and carefully sipping soda through a straw—so as not to defile the fancy makeup on my lips.

Jennifer is here doing makeup and hair styling as usual. She's SO incredibly fun and great to work with. I actually met her on hotornot.com in about 2001. And, we've been friends ever since.

Working on a shoot like this seems to be a lot of "hurry up and wait." I rushed to get here at 2 PM and then they didn't even need me for anything for over an hour. Now I'm sitting around in my costume with my hair and makeup done, being careful not to get dirty or let anything in the filthy industrial warehouse touch my zippy, white seersucker-and-stripes suit.

It's so weird. Sometimes I look around at things and marvel that this is actually my life. I mean, I'm going to go sit in this lush, dark gypsy tent scene while people run around with lights and cameras and hopefully cookies. I would really like to be eating cookies right now.

Although, I don't think I actually want cookies, but rather just want something to distract me or consume my attention. Cookies seem to do that pretty well. Although, it's basically using them as a drug to avoid the way I'm feeling.

Mmmm. Delicious cookie drugs!

Life is great, though. I was thinking about my life yesterday. The only thing in my life that I would really change is that I would have more money. And, if that's the only thing I can think of that desperately needs to change, well, then life ain't too bad!

On Monday I'm going to the Swedish Consulate in San Francisco to talk about getting my work visa. I have to rush to the airport after that, because my friend Tess asked me to be her date to the British Consulate party on Tuesday night—in Los Angeles. Hooray for airplanes! Two consulates in one day! (And, I'm hoping I get to meet James Bond and eat petit fours off of spy chicks atop a gleaming Aston Martin. Isn't that what happens at the British Consulate? That's how the movies make it out to be.)

I've been strangely anxious in the last few weeks. I've also started to have nightmares and night sweats again. I think I know why, though: I decided to cut my Prozac dose in half. Note to self: I am not a psychiatrist and should not change my medications all willy-nilly.

This is the second time I've tried to cut my meds down on my own. And, the same anxious explosion came with the last attempt. So, I'm going back to my normal dose of happy pills.


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