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2002-03-26 10:06 a.m.

Andie and I walked across the street from our house to go and walk on the beach last night. It amazes me that I will drive hours and hours or fly across the world to see something beautiful, yet I so seldom even walk across the street to enjoy the sun setting—painting the sky and innocent clouds with a frenzy of impossible colors before coyly disappearing like a fiery ball into the endless Pacific ocean.

We silently stood and watched, in awe, as the cold wind bit at our noses and ears.

So now I must ask myself, why is it, when such fantastic beauty is less than 30 seconds away, that I will still not go that tiny distance to be a part of it?

I get so tired sometimes, and feel so overloaded. I want to do nothing but lay down in my room, relax, maybe listen to music. I don't want to think, read, watch videos, or even browse the net.

And then there is music. I love it so much, and I am so compelled to spend so much of time writing and recording these songs which float into my head. Lately, working on music is a double edged sword...Music is somehow a dull, nagging pain and an addicting pleasure in one. It brings me so much joy and through it my passion flows...but working on it takes me away from my friends and loved ones, which bums me out, especially lately as I have been so immersed in getting this demo ready. And I suppose I see a lot less sunsets.


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